Mr. Woodchild

Those of you who do not know Mr. Woodchild, the previous incident with Mr. Longarrow was directly involving Mr. Woodchild too. He judged me that I have done something very wrong by reporting Mr. Longarrow. He has also continously saying things that Mr. Longarrow desired to hear, and tried to guilt trip me to apologise to Mr. Longarrow.

Anyway, that's enough of a prequel to start this bitching session today.

I was searching for some basic first year engineering knowledge online on Friday, which I need now but have all returned to my lecturers. I came across a powerpoint presentation done by a China university available online. So I clicked and downloaded it for view, but have trouble opening it, as the powerpoint popup said "Cannot decode the text.".

So I approached our outsourced IT guy -- Mr. Woodchild for this matter. After trying for a while, he said he can't figure it out, and asked me to send that file to him for a look. So I sent that file to him.

Today, Saturday morning 11am, I received an sms from him:

"The file u sent me yesterday I still cannot open. Ask ur that person who sent you that file, how did he save that file? I m giving up on this file since it is your personal 1 and not office 1... Tks, Regards, *his real name*"

Nevermind his tone, but I was furious over what he wrote, because it is a false accusation, and a serious one. I wrote back to him, thank him for trying, and clarified that I have never used the company computer for personal things, and that file was not a personal file, it is for work.

His reply was a typical sewage:

"Then on Monday I will send to the *my company name* in China for verification."

Bloody hell, what does he want to verify? To proof that his false accusation was correct? I am so fed up with this guy, who always, and purposely mix up with the black and white. Afterall, what more can I expect from a guy who suck up to Mrs. Azrael?

Justice comes with blooed (07 Nov 2008)

Something happened today, one of the colleague from other department, Mr. Longarrow, is attempting to take the company documents away with him when he resign. The document he took for scanning was mine, which there are only two copies in the company. One with my boss, one with me.

There were no outcome after direct confrontion with him, so I decided to report to the admins.

I don't know how to face him for the next three months.

He is one of the friends that I've made over the past couple of months in the company. He is not a bad person, but he has done something wrong. I couldn't let him off just because he is my friend, it is a difficult situation.

It is hard to do the right thing. I hope that I won't be punished for doing the right thing. But I can't help feeling that justice serves with a price.

I have also learned a lesson, which is not to trust people so easily. But how do you draw a line?

Gargamel and Azrael

If you ever watch Smurf, the bad characters are Gargamel and Azrael the cat.

In my office, if I take Ir. Decamouth as Gargamel, then he has his "Azrael" planted in almost every department, the one in engineering + project is a lady, I will now call her Mrs. Azrael.

But to be frank, I don't think Ir. Decamouth is even in par with Gargamel, he is a senior "Azrael" working for Mr. Bell, anyway, that's besides the story.

Ir. Decamouth as usual was pushing his stuffs away, and meanwhile trying to trap me in another job. As me and the project engineer of Project S was annoyed by him, and planning to take action against it, he somehow managed to find out what we said, and took a step before us.

We later found out that it was Mrs. Azrael that was reporting our conversations and plans to Decamouth and Mr. Bell.

To be frank, I can't understand why people enjoy being a spy for lousy people like Decamouth and Bell. But this Mrs. Azrael isn't just a spy for them, she is also the spy for our HR manager. I wonder those who have multiple identity will ever fail on their own conspirasy?

Having tasted this incident yesterday, it reminded me of what my boss once told me -- "You never know who you can and cannot trust in this country." I wonder what kind of personality do I need to have in order to kill these crocoaches, one thing for sure, Shelltox is only a temporary solution.

In the name of love

When I was still in junior secondary, we used to have the luxury of slotting art studies into the school subjects.

One day, our art teacher came into the class, asking us to draw a poster for one of the latest campaign in the public -- to raise the public concern of the relationship between parents and children. It was a hot topic at that moment, that parents were not spending enough time with the children.

I have a deep feeling over this issue, as I myself is growing up in a family that is so close yet so far. I drew my feelings, but I ended up getting a "C". I was cynical over the drawing that was chosen to take part in the poster competition of the campaign -- It was a drawing showing caring parents holding their children in their arms, or something along those lines.

I have almost forgotten this drawing until when I came back home about a year ago, cleaning up my room, and I found that drawing again. It has since then printed in my head. Surprisingly, it is still the same feeling I have after living for so many years.

This is a rough duplication of my drawing, without the words, and the person surrounded in black is replaced with my avatar:

On the face of it, I am supposed to feel happy and merry over what I have. But I can't deny the fact that I am feeling alone and down more than when I was away from home. I still feel cynical over things that show lovey-dovey stuffs, because to me, we all suffer under the name of love.

To give you a few examples, some parents planned the future for their kids, so well that the kids never have time to play. Tuitions after tuitions, piano classes after computer classes etc. All in the name of love, so that they can have a better future when they grow up. But the kids will only grow up becoming walking zombies.

Some lovers force their other half into fitting their own mould, knowing very well the descrepancies between them. While the other halves force themselves to believe in the happy future and fit into the mould given to them. All in the name of love, so that they can be together forever. But neither is happy.

This is my opinion about love, I am being cynical, and have no means of hiding it.

Some thoughts

Well, lunch isn't over yet, my boss did not turn up to work today, so I am writing something to pass time.

When I was 15, it was a very tough year, there were two major exams that I needed to attend before entering to the senior secondary. I was also committee member of various bodies, both within and outside the class.

It was an extremely busy year for me, I found that 24 hours were not enough. I was so stressed up, that one day I pulled out the knob on my watch, hoping to stop the time. It took me a while to settle my mind and adjust the watch to let it run again.

Years later, I have learned to sit on the pointers on my watch, than trying to stop them as I have done during secondary school.

I hope that one day, I could sit on the center of the clock, watching the second, minute and hour pointers chasing each other peacefully, and do not feel rushed by them. I guess it takes a lot of patience and experience to have that kind of grace.

Happy Valentine's Day

A lady in my office asked if I received anything for the Valentine's Day.

I said no.

She said that our office seems very quiet for Valentine's, and I suspect it is because all the ladies in the office aren't available anymore.

Anyway, I nearly forgot it is Valentine's today... so here it is, a flower:

Mr. Bell

Sigh, I should probably draw up a chart for the relationship between all these people in my office. Anyway, let's introduce you our Mr. Bell.

Mr. Bell is a mysterious person in the office, no one knows his job title, no one knows what he does. We all know that he is a director, and kinda think that he deals with contracts and proposal clauses. He has recently taken up an extra responsibilty as the project director, since the formal project director has left his position. Mr. Bell is also a strong ally for Ir. Decamouth.

Mr. Bell was trying to put our department on the grill since long time ago, he has caused my boss some difficulties to explain situations with the Managing Director, he is also good in manipulating information. But this morning he failed -- He tried to claim that we were late for completing the submittal drawings, by refering to the wrong schedule. Somehow I feel that he is too cunning of an old bird to make such obvious mistake... there must be something up in his sleeves.

Anyway, Mr. Bell's "effort" has resulted a little shock to Mr. Pig, he is now cutting down his chatting/dilly-dally time. However Mr. Pig was fighting back very hard today for not wanting to take responsibilities for his mistakes, he even claimed, "It is not my job to ensure that the drawings are correct at every detail." and refused to make corrections to the drawing.

I felt that he was very irresponsible to make such a statement, and told him with a stern voice, "xoxo, everyone makes mistakes. It is alright to make mistakes, but one should correct it as soon as it is identified, instead of finding excuses or picking on others."

Mr. Pig was shocked, and quickly continued to murmur that it wasn't his fault, I carried on by asking him if he could meet the deadline. He refused to answer, and his eyes were red. I walked passed him, and went back to my seat behind him, continue to demand for his answer for the deadline, he finally gave me a very upset "uummm!".

I wonder if I am doing the right thing. I do not want to upset people, I was only being stern with his overboard statments. As usual, my mother said that I am not doing the right thing, and I should buy Pig a lunch, cause I probably have hurt his ego. Sigh... what ego do you worth having if you can't even have the guts to make corrections on your own mistakes? I wonder...

Do you have any better ways to face the ever stubborn person like Mr. Pig?

Mr. Pig

A typical conversation with Mr. Pig:

me, "xx, can you check this dimension? the pipe diameter shown on your drawing is not 14 inch."

Pig, "Oh, I got this template from him," pointing his finger over to another draft person, "he draw it that way, so I just use it..." Brushing the mistake straight off his shoulder, and totally refused to admit that he is wrong.

me, "Well, you are supposed to check the template dimension when you copied it."

Pig, "But the template was like that..."

me, "The template was merely an example, it wasn't to scale. The drawing you are working now, is an approval drawing, you need to get it right."

Pig turned his back on me, and kept quiet.

=========================================================

I am have nothing personal against Mr. Pig, but I strongly disagree with his behaviour towards me, and his way of working.

We start work at 8am, he arrives office at 8am. Filling up his water bottle, starting up PC, having his breakfast, checking emails etc.... unless you push him, else he won't start working until at least 9am.

He also have tonnes of phone calls and instant messaging while working... busy chit-chatting and did not pay attention to his work.

If he goes out during lunch time at 12pm, when he gets back to office at 1pm, he would bring along with his take away lunch box, start eating it away while everyone has already started work. Not to mention that he would take up one hour (from 1pm - 2pm) to read newspaper etc.

This is the first time I am meeting someone who won't budge no matter what you do, has no improvement after being scolded. I am not the first one who "lecture" him, the project engineers scolded him worse, and my boss too has been "nagging" him.

I do not want to waste time to scold people, I don't care who the person it, an angel or serial killer, all I want is to get the job done. How can I get him to work?! I feel like biting an overcooked squid, whereby the harder you bite, the more frustrated you get... because you get can't get that bloody (or inky?) squid to break. >_<"

Mayonnaise Jar and Coffee

I was reading my friend's blog just now, and it striked me with this story I received a while ago. I googled it, and paste it over here, cause I think it worth the keep.

I have been telling my students to learn prioritise their task in life, after realising how important it is via harsh lessons. I wonder any of my words ever entered their heart?

Anyway, here it is again:
------------------------------------------------------------------

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar . . .and the coffee . .

A professor stood before his Philosophy class and had some items infront of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and emptymayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.

He then asked the students if the jar was full.They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into thejar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else.

He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous "yes."

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you torecognize that this jar represents your life.

The golf balls are the important things - your God, family, yourchildren, your health, your friends, and your favorite passions - thingsthat if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life wouldstill be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, yourhouse, and your car. The sand is everything else-the small stuff.

If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is noroom for the pebbles or the golf balls.

The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you willnever have room for the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.
Play with your children;
Take time to get medical checkups;
Take your partner out to dinner;
Play another 18;
There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffeerepresented. The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem,there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend."

Respect on Sale

My father was admitted into the hospital over this long weekend holiday.

I dislike the fact, that they delayed my father for the purpose of having him staying for extra days, so that they can claim it off the insurance. I won't bore you with the details, actions and conversations.

The staffs in the hospital are so money minded, it made me shiver. The basic ethics to run a hospital, is in a way, very similar to running a school. You need to have a heart to do the job, and the routine will keep challenging your moral. Some people surrender their sense of righteous; some people quit because they can't stand the pain. Either one is no good.

I learned a lesson, this is a country (or perhaps it has affected the whole world?), whereby people value your life proportionally to your money and status (mind you, the status can be bought too). And respect, as a human being, is determined by the colour of the plastic in your wallet.

From Shanghai with love

I went out on Thursday with my brother to meet up our virtual friends, a newly-wed couple from Shanghai. This is the first time we met.

I knew them since about 6 years ago, along with a whole bunch of others in the Shanghai forum, while studying in the UK. I eventually stopped visiting the forum after coming back here, thanks to the bandwidth. The forum too have eventually closed down.

But the friendships have grown onto the next level, and the communications continued on the MSN and various other chatting machine. (Too bad my company banded all sorts of forum and chatting software) Their friendship has accompanied me through the toughest days in my life so far. It is strange sometimes to feel closer to a virtual person, whom you have never met before; while feeling distant with the person who you see each other everyday.

Anyway, it was a very pleasant meeting, it brought back a lot of memories when I was typing with them over in the UK, sitting alone in the workroom over the cold winter. We chatted non-stop for 4-5 hours. I wanted to give her a hug when we said good-bye, but thought it is not an eastern culture, so I refrained myself. We all know that it will be a long while before we could meet each other again.

I feel bad for not being able to take more time out to bring them around the city, I sincerely hope they had a good trip... though I doubted it. Cause her husband fell sick a day before we met.

Male Chauvinism and Gender Discrimination

I have recently been appointed as the acting head of Project S. Being the only female in the team, and the acting head, no only I have to deal with Ir. Decamouth, but also Mr. Pig.

Mr. Pig is my sub-ordinate in this project, and he has trouble accepting instructions from a female. Despite constantly making a lot of mistakes, refuse taking in suggestions, he still tries to show some vain authorities.

Mr. Pig was drafting for Project C, and wouldn't finish the drawing until next week, in order to start Project S. But when the structural engineer in the team gave him the details for Project S, he took it as an instruction to start Project S, and questioned me why haven't I given him the work order. I told him the administrative work hasn't been finalised, however if he thinks he can start Project S now, I can give him the neccessary technical details to go ahead. He then said that my boss will not be happy if he starts drawing without a proper work order.

Well, my boss has been fully awared of this all the while, and has given me the permission to start the technical design and drawing while the sales manager is trying to get the administrative stuffs finalised with the customer. Mr. Pig did not like it when I explained that to him, and turned his back to me while I was giving him the unfinalised work order.

I am very upset by the fact that female have to work harder to gain recognition, just because of these MCPs (google this abbreviation, I can't be bothered to explain it). It is as if it is my fault to be a female, something that I have totally no control over -- my gender.

Though working in a male dominated environment, I am bounded by various pigs, but to me, this is a form of gender discrimination.

One obvious example is during a meeting, (this has nothing to do with Mr. Pig), I gave a valid suggestion, but no one supported it, they sometimes even ignore it, until my boss picks it up, and bring it up again... then suddenly everyone cheer over it and said it is a good suggestion that should be put into action as soon as possible. The same word coming from a guy's mouth carries different weight when it comes from mine.

I agree that guys have their own challenges that gals can't understand. But given the fact that I am being unfairly treated, I don't think this is something to argue about who is getting a tougher life, as gals have our own challenges that guys can't understand either.

I do not expect people to treat me like a princess nor a lady, but I deserve a respect. I will not bend over these MCP attitude, which often disguise as "oh, female are so sensitive, don't be so sensitive if you want to work in this field."

I am starting to understand why people often regard female leaders as strict people -- While female sub-ordinates generally have no problem taking orders from bosses from both genders; male tend to have issue when the instructions are coming from a female superior. We just have to be a lot more assertive in order to get guys working, which is often being mistaken as strict.

Nonetheless, this is the first time my department has a project acting head, and a female one. I shall solve these resistance with grace. And since I love pork, I shall make these MCPs into some gourmet pork recipes.

A girls' night out

I went out with three of my secondary school friends last night, one of them just came back from Shanghai for CNY.

We had a dinner and chit chat non-stop last night, followed by casual shopping. I was then lead into a cosmetic shop, surrendered my face to the sales lady to put on a make up. I felt transformed after putting on the layer of colours.

Despite not having a lot of common topics to talk about with these gals, I always enjoyed their companionship. Among us, I am the most outdated one -- when they learned to groom themselves, I was too busy spending my time studying and watching my budgets. I enjoyed seeing them turning into such beautiful ladies, but I myself never have the confidence and guts to become one.

I have done make ups before, but I never take the initiative to pick it up. Most importantly, I do not know how to behave after putting on these things. Nonetheless, I felt like a lady for once in my life. Though I still have to watch my budgets today, I hope that it is not too late for me to learn up the skills and attitude to be beautiful. ^_^

Seventh day of CNY

Today is the 7th day of the Chinese New Year (CNY), it is supposed to be the day when human were created.

There are various tradition for celebrating this day, depending on the origin of various clans. My family have Lui Cha for today. It is supposed to be a mixture of vegetable dishes, eat with rice and herbal soup.

There are supposed to have at least 7 dishes, each carrying auspicious meaning. My mum didn't really care, she only has the garlic plant (for good in calculations), the bean curd (for having assistance when you are in trouble), peanuts (for growing wealth), long beans (for long life). The remaining veges were mainly to make up the quantity.

The key ingredients for the soup are parsley (for steping up to the next level. We couldn't buy it this year, it was substituted with mint), tea leaves (we substitute it with another herb also, unfortunately I don't know the English name of it), peanut paste, dried anchovies paste, sesame paste (this is an extra ingredient, it is for not being bothered by small things) etc.

It is a meal that takes a lot of effort to prepare. We don't usually get to eat it unless there is a big event... such as CNY, or someone is coming home from overseas.

Anyway, I love Lui Cha, it tastes very refreshing after having rather meaty dishes over the past few days of CNY. I think I have already consumed more than my one year share of meat and junk food over the first 6 days of CNY. >_<"